MANET:
It’s you. Rather… it’s Emile Zola… I just had a huge argument with Paul here, as to whether or not you were Chinese. Sorry, as to whether or not Emile Zola is Chinese. He thinks no, but clearly you are, and I believe I’ve been under the impression you’ve always been Chinese, sorry, that Emile Zola has always been Chinese, so… So in order to settle the dispute I painted this portrait using only my mental and emotional recollections of Emile Zola. By accessing my unique perception of the interior human condition, I attempted to recreate an accurate portrayal of the man Emile Zola, as he is. You can see that I’ve painted someone who is clearly not Chinese. Therefore, it is my conclusion, which I’ve reached using my awesome ability to paint how mankind experiences a concept, that you are not Chinese. Sorry, that Emile Zola is not Chinese. That no man experiences the concept of Emile Zola as Chinese. Therefore, you are not Emile Zola. Because you, sir, are Chinese.
ZOLA:
I’m not Chinese.
MANET:
Oh. Well that solves it, then. Paul, you were right, Zola is not Chinese, and this man is not Chinese, so therefore he must be Zola.
